Other People Often Aren't As Shallow As They Seem
People who aren't doing well socially sometimes feel they can't relate to other people. One common complaint that flows out of this is that they feel other people are dumb and shallow. Since they see themselves as deep and intelligent, they naturally feel a little alienated.
Some people are irredeemably superficial and vacuous. I'm not going to argue that. Not everyone is though, and in my experience, a lot fewer than you'd think. This article will offer a little defense of seemingly shallow people, and the superficial things they do.
There are many superficial traits that can make people seem more shallow than they are
I think a big problem with the "Everyone sucks, I have nothing in common with them" attitude is that you can end up writing off lots of people before you even give them a chance. Many people who seem superficial do have 'deep' interests or tendencies. The problem is that their more surface features are easy to see, but their deeper traits are more hidden. I know many guys who seem like dumb, vain jocks at a glance, but who read constantly and can easily hold their own in a discussion about economics or the Western Canon.
I know girls who seem like all they care about is make-up and clubbing, but who are interested in philosophy and history. The thing is these people also do have more 'shallow' traits and hobbies, and they're the first thing you notice. If you never spoke to them and just went on the stereotype their appearance conjured up, you'd never know it though. There are tons of people like this out there.
Shallowness isn't an all or nothing thing either. Someone could spend the day reading about soil erosion in third world countries then go out at night and get drunk with their friends. So be open minded, don't be too quick to judge people, squawk, squawk, squawk.
Here are some things that may make deep, intelligent people come off as dumbasses at a glance:
Personality
Some people are quite smart, but they have naturally scatterbrained, happy go lucky, or short-attention-span personalities and can come off as seeming less together than they are.
Style of speaking
Some people have a fast, ditzy "Like, OhMyGod! No Way!" style of talking that can hide their intelligence. Another dumb-sounding style of talking is if someone over does it with that stoned, laid-back-surfer inflection. Even the fairly common habit of using conversational filler such as 'like' and 'you know' can make people come off as less with it.
The way they act when they're having a good time
The way people act when they're excitable and having fun can make them seem dumb and shallow as well. Guys can get loud and crude. Girls can get shrill and hyper. That kind of stuff is a pretty natural way to behave when people are in 'fun mode'. They may still be able to have a calm, rational discussion when they're in a different mood, and under different conditions.
Place in life
Many intelligent, complicated people go through phases in their lives where they enjoy going out and partying a lot, and generally come across as shallow. Eventually they grow out of it and start to enjoy things that are more toned down.
Their social circle's shared style or interests
Social circles can have a few common denominators that apply to every member. Maybe they all like X,Y,Z and their friendship revolves around that. Each individual member also has their own unique, more esoteric interests. However, since the rest of the group doesn't share these interests, they may not feel any need to bring them up. It's not that they'd be ostracized, just that the other members wouldn't be that interested or be able to have a good conversation about it. It's easier to stick to the things everyone has in common. A group of people could all seem uniform on the surface, but deeper down there's a range of less obvious interests and opinions.
This effect also works in reverse and can apply to non-'deep' things. In a group that isn't particularly interested in sports, a member may be a really good athlete, but not feel the need to mention it. And if you looked at them you'd never realize it.
Acceptable topics
Lots of people have certain topics they'd love to discuss with everyone (e.g., political and social issues) but they've learned that doing so can get everyone riled up and lead to arguments. They decided a while ago that it was better to resist the urge to talk about things like religion's negative influence on the world because it's not worth the bad vibes that it can cause.
Style of their intelligence
Lots of people are smart and interesting, but they come across as pretty regular people, not as refined intellectuals. I think some people can make the mistake of thinking someone is only smart if they like to discuss things like logical fallacies and Game Theory. Not every brainy person is like that. That doesn't mean they have nothing to offer though.
Their looks and fashion sense
Another thing that can hide someone's deepness is their appearance. Someone may accidentally fall into dressing or grooming a certain way, because they like a particular look (though they don't really identify with the subculture that look is associated with), because they have to, or because that's how their friends dress.
Their thoughts are concealed
It's easy to think other people are less deep than you because you only see their surface behaviors. You, on the other hand, have access to all your hidden inner thoughts, many of which are profound and insightful. Couldn't other people have just as rich a mental life as you? And couldn't people look at you under some situations and think there isn't much going on in your head? If someone just saw you going about your weekly routine from a distance, how much would they really know about you?
They seem pretty content
Don't think you have to be angsty, cynical, and preoccupied with existential questions to be deep, or that anyone who is happy, care-free, and fun is shallow, in an "ignorance is bliss" kind of way. I went through a phase where I was bummed about the point of life, but I worked through it and am now more laid back and cheerful. That I'm happy now doesn't mean I'm a peasant who never thinks about those bigger issues.
They have good social skills
Some people go so far as to think anyone who seems comfortable with other people, and happy in a group, is automatically a sheep. They think deep people can only be wretched social outcasts. I think it's always good to be able to get along with people. Even if you're super complicated and hardly anyone can converse on your level, it doesn't hurt.
In moderation shallowness isn't inherently bad
If you're totally vapid, and you have nothing else going for you, that's no good. But in reasonable does, shallow things are fine:
Shallowness is part of the lighter side of socializing
There are different modes people can socialize under. Some forms of supposed shallowness is part of that fun, silly side of being with people. It isn't better or worse than being reflective and serious, just different. You can't operate in one social style all the time though, just like you're not always in the mood to watch an intense, draining 3-hour drama when you pick a movie. If you lean a little too much towards the logical, serious side of things, consider adding some lighter elements to your personality to balance things out.
Shallow things can be fun
I like cheesy, gratuitously violent video games as much as the next guy. I watch loud, shiny action movies. I read websites full of puddle deep throwaway humor. There's nothing to any of these things, but they're fun. Nothing wrong with having fun.
Shallow things can be a guilty pleasure
Lots of people realize that some of the things they like are fluffy and trashy. But they're a guilty pleasure, so why not? People will listen to disposable bubble-gum pop because it's catchy. They'll watch reality T.V. or daytime talk shows because of the train wreck appeal of the people on them.
In the same vein, some people do things that they acknowledge are an illogical waste of money on one level, but do them anyways because they like it and get some payoff. I know women who realize they spend too much on make-up or purses, but that's their thing and they feel it makes them look good. Maybe you've bought a high-end action figure, or a neat sculpture or sword to put in your room. Some people probably didn't see the point of those purchases, but you liked them so you got them.
Shallow people can be fun
Even if you may never want to have a long, involved discussion with them, more vacuous people can still be entertaining enough to idly chat to, or to keep you company when you go out.
Some shallow things aren't really shallow at all
Some things that you may label as shallow and mindless are actually quite complicated. Sports often get written off, but they're full of strategy. Some T.V. shows or comics can have deeper plots than people would give them credit for at a glance.
Some shallow things have positive benefits
A guy who works out just to look better is still staying in great shape. A woman who cares a little too much about clothes and her appearance still looks good. A guy who plays too many video games is still probably honing a broader life skill or two.
Some shallow things work for other people
Sometimes we can look down on the lifestyle or life path other people take. Just because it may not appeal you, it doesn't mean it isn't rewarding to them. You may think a 9-5 job, a house in the suburbs, and 2.2 kids is soul sucking, but other people may think it's fulfilling.